Never Been Thawed
Shawn has been collecting frozen dinners since he was twelve. Today he works part-time as a dental hygienist to cover the cost of operating fourteen full-sized freezers in a one bedroom apartment. Shawn is the founder of the Mesa Frozen Entrée Enthusiasts' Club, a small group of fanatical collectors determined to host the world's first Frozen Entrée Enthusiasts' Convention. Shelly became infatuated with Shawn and joined the club after seeing him sing with his band. In a shameless bid for money and fame, Shawn had recently "converted" his obscene punk band to Christian rock. Shelly, a counselor on an Intercourse Prevention Hotline, a devout Christian and proud virgin was smitten by Shawn's "Christian bad-boy" image. Al, the bass player, questions his band's new direction. He belongs to Shawn's club primarily to foster his secret crush on Shelly. Al's prospects are not helped by the fact that he lives with his parents and works as a "smilist" at Klown Kutz. Milo, the band's manager, owns the No Choice Café--an anti-abortion themed Christian café located across the street from an abortion clinic. Milo believes Shawn's band is ready for the Christian Big Time and has set up a showcase performance for Holy Trinity Records. Meanwhile, Vince, the club's wealthiest member, has assembled an entrée collection that may soon rival Shawn's. Vince's impressive collection makes him a serious threat to Shawn's authority.